Silver Lining, Day 19

Now, if I sign something without reading it, and then get called on it, I have the perfect defense: I though it was an executive order!

Silver Lining, Day 18

The Makers of Mountain Dew spared us the return of Puppy Baby Monkey, figuring we have already suffered enough with the one in Washington.

Silver Lining, Day 17

Comparatively speaking, Joe Buck seems less annoying.

Silver Lining, Day 16

Image credit: ztirfeed via Bored Panda

Since I've shaved my head, I can now make fun of unkempt hairstyles without a shred of hypocrisy.

Silver Lining, Day 15

Now, when I sit down on the toilet and tweet, I feel Presidential!

Silver Lining, Day 14

This year's Punxsutawney Phil will be the greatest groundhog ever to see, or not see, his own shadow. All the previous groundhogs throughout history were total losers! Sad!

Silver Lining, Day 13

The percentage of citizens getting laid because of their Trump tattoos has dropped 63% in just under two weeks!