Silver Lining, Day 200

To commemorate 200 days in office, Trump is giving every American a free blender. The bad news: they're coal-powered.

Silver Lining, Day 199

If silver linings were bottles of beer, we'd all be drunk.

Silver Lining, Day 198

After only one day on vacation in New Jersey, Trump has called Philadelphians "a bunch of losers," prompting Pennsylvania to mobilize troops on its eastern border. There are further reports that a rowdy scrum of Phillies fans also test-fired a bunch of those NERF rockets in an open act of aggression.

Silver Lining, Day 197

Trump going on vacation. White House being renovated while he's away. They have to change all the locks in case Flynn, Spicer, Priebus or Scaramucci made keys. Also, finally getting around to child-proofing.

Silver Lining, Day 196

Alien invasion thwarted by Donald after he convinces high commander Zorp from planet Querk-221 that, as overlords, they'd have to pay for the wall on the Mexican border. #BestPresidentintheUniverse

Silver Lining, Day 195

Thankful that the wave of liberal violence spawned by The Public's production of Julius Caesar has finally subsided.

Silver Lining, Day 194

Disappointed that Congress couldn't step up and swap for Justin Trudeau before the trade deadline yesterday.