Silver Lining, Day 132

Clearly, Donald is trolling me. I will not take the bait. #covfefe

Silver Lining, Day 131

Petition to Merriam-Webster to amend the definition of "fake" to include "unflattering to president" was rejected by the editorial board. Toddler-in-Chief then tweeted out that "Diktionaries used by ISIS to korrupt our kids! Heard this from someone somewhere (Fox?) so must be true! Sad! #KoolAid #WithoutIrony"

Silver Lining, Day 130

President found another way to pay for the wall, by translating food packaging for our friends in China:

Silver Lining, Day 129

Flights of beer make him a little more tolerable. — drinking beer at Coney Island Brewery.

Silver Lining, Day 128

I welcome all the fuss about Melania's $50,000 Dolce & Gabbana jacket. It makes me reminisce about the good old days when we used to pick on the President for stupid stuff, unlike, you know, all the treason and collusion and batshit craziness of 2017.

Silver Lining, Day 127

Fun with Autofill.

ALL CAPS is starting text, the rest is up to my phone. Feel free to share your own!

DONALD TRUMP the best way to wash away that new president smell.

SMALL HANDS of the first one but I'm not a fan of grapefruit.

PUTIN has a great role model for the hullabaloo and I have had a gastric sleeve.

THE PRESIDENT SPEAKS to be a worry wart.

SEAN SPICER SAYS "not sure if the incense will be burning or not, it's true that the total cost in tolls for four trips is a great lager from Kenya."

THE RUSSIANS HACKED into a pumpkin pie and the rest of your family.

SNOWFLAKES are still mad about the election despite the millions of our friends that voted illegally and the new hacked account shows you are a friend of mine.

SILVER LININGS and the new president of the United States would be easier than the first time I heard this much cursing at the Illinois State Fair in Springfield.

Have fun, folks!

Silver Lining, Day 126

Those astute enough to invest in Smoke and Mirrors in 2016 are much wealthier today!

Silver Lining, Day 125

Pope Francis survived first contact with Trumpolini. "He is something," Mr. Trump said, illustrating, yet again, his masterful command of the English language.

Silver Lining, Day 124

I'm thinking more about my mother today more than I'm thinking about our president. Happy Birthday, Mom!

Silver Lining, Day 123

Mr. Trump's yarmulke fended off a hostile takeover by his hair.

Silver Lining, Day 122

The Power of Oil.

Silver Lining, Day 121

A camel in Saudi Arabia was just overheard telling another camel, "My, that's a handsome man."

Silver Lining, Day 120

Note to White House staff- when Trump is overseas on his 9-day trip, remove all the doorknobs in the building. It's a great prank and, if there's anything we've learned in the past 120 days, it's that he has a great sense of humor. If he threatens to fire anyone, just blame that trickster, Nancy Pelosi.

Silver Lining, Day 119

They burn witches, right?

Silver Lining, Day 118

Even I have enough sense to know it's a bad idea to piss off Mossad!

Silver Lining, Day 117 (part 2)

Silver Lining, Day 117 (part 1)

If he does it, it is right. If we disagree, it is fake news. We are really just hung up on losing the election despite the millions of our friends that voted illegally. We're all just a bunch of babies. Russia is our friend. These words form a cloud. The silver lining is that this cloud is not my reality. And still, no sign of Billy Bush.

Silver Lining, Day 116

After being called out for my daily expressions of "hatred and anger," I have self-reflected and decided that my level of "hatred and anger" pales in comparison to that of our elected officials and segments of the media that are instruments of their disdain.

As a matter of fact, I am comfortable with my level of "hatred and anger," especially as it is offset by my love for my friends and family, my appreciation of tattoos and poetry, and my odd fascination with discarded umbrellas.

This silver lining comes with a bonus. If you feel the obligation to feel sorry for me, I absolve you of that burden. Please expend your pity on others who are more deserving.

Silver Lining, Day 115

Wishing Ivana, Marla and Melania a Happy Mother's Day!

Silver Lining, Day 114

The fact that 5 Rabbit Cervecería in Chicago makes a beer called "Chinga Tu Pelo" or, translated "Fuck Your Hair," dedicated to Trumpy. It's hard to find outside of the Windy City, but you can buy Chinga Tu Pelo merch on their website. Proceeds support Latinos Progresando, the largest Latino-led, family-based immigration legal services program in the State of Illinois.

Silver Lining, Day 113

Trumpelstiltskin can't spin shit into gold.

Silver Lining, Day 112

Greater job security for law enforcement and coroners when the bodies start popping up. It's only a matter of time.

Silver Lining, Day 111

Trump finally found a way to pay for The Wall.

Silver Lining, Day 110

At some point they'll run out of things to blame on Obama.

Silver Lining, Day 109

Donald Trump isn't distracted by imaginary friends - they all left him because he was such a dick.

Silver Lining, Day 108

France.

Silver Lining, Day 107

Secret Service instructed not to let Trump into the Rose Garden. They are authorized to use deadly force, if necessary.

It's World Naked Gardening Day... and people are sharing hilarious memes

TODAY is World Naked Gardening Day – an event that encourages people to be totally at one with nature. Naturists from across the globe are stripping off for a spot…

Silver Lining, Day 106

Rain in New York City - the best way to wash away that new president smell!

Trump Returns to New York for His First Visit as President

The president’s stay on Thursday, expected to be just hours long and largely behind closed doors, was nonetheless weighted in meaning for many.

NYTIMES.COM

Silver Lining, Day 105

Sorry, folks, today's silver lining was repealed by a bunch of syphilitic hypocrites. Come back tomorrow knowing that all of these sycophants will be one day closer to their eternal dirt naps.

Silver Lining, Day 104

May is National Golf Month so maybe Trump can take some time off from not doing everything he said he would do and spend some relaxing time on the links.

Silver Lining, Day 103

Trump once again snubbed, receiving absolutely ZERO Tony nominations. The EGOT continues to elude him.

Silver Lining, Day 102

If Cruella de Vil were president, we would be out of Dalmatians.