Silver Lining, Day 526

Silver Lining, Day 525

If you have friends who are annoyed about people protesting injustice, know that they will likely be annoyed for the rest of their natural lives. #TheLongHaul

Silver Lining, Day 524

A Free Press:

Silver Lining, Day 523

Trump, McConnell, SCOTUS. Thanks for the reminder to schedule my colonoscopy when I see the doctor tomorrow. Assholes.

Silver Lining, Day 522

Too far away to smell the Executive Odor.

Silver Lining, Day 521

Can you blame those restaurants for refusing service? It takes FOREVER to clean the stench of hypocrisy and prevarication out of the upholstery!

Silver Lining, Day 520

[This silver lining was *disappeared* because it did not meet the favor of Lord Putin]

Silver Lining, Day 519

Paying for The Wall by selling tofu snacks!

Silver Lining, Day 518

Melania has ten other jackets with messages on them. Here they are, in no particular order:

10- "My taste in clothes is better than my taste in men."

9- "My other husband is a Democrat."

8- "My husband won the electoral college and all I got was this lousy jacket."

7- "Hillary! Why did you stop e-mailing me?"

6- "Donald sleeps on the couch."

5- "Fox and Friends - Donald's Viagra."

4- "Fuck vegetables. Eat the poor!"

3- "Don't Grab What You Can't Afford."

2- "I don't like bullies. I just marry them."

And

1- "Covfefe is Slovenian for Tiny Penis."

Silver Lining, Day 517

Yesterday's Silver Lining was abducted by the same people who will never accept responsibility for anything.

Silver Lining, Day 516

[This Silver Lining fled the country with the last shred of our dignity.]

Silver Lining, Day 515

I got these cool socks for Father's Day. All Donald got was a border wall that Eric built him out of macaroni.

Silver Lining, Day 514

Immigrant kids separated from their families could be holed up in a Texas warehouse, chained to tables, working on a new Trump clothing line and 50% of America would have no problem with it. Happy that most people reading this are with me in the Other 50% and those that aren't are considering the "unfriend" button right about now.

Silver Lining, Day 513

Donald doesn't use sunscreen. They don't make SPF 666.

Silver Lining, Day 512

[This Silver Lining was Eaten by Bigfoot.]

Silver Lining, Day 511

Donnie secretly rooting for Russia in the World Cup. Duh. Not saying this because Putin helped get him elected, but because he always roots for Ivan Drago when he hate-watches Rocky IV.

Silver Lining, Day 510

You know it was a Great Deal because Donald got it without Kim signing a pre-nup!

Silver Lining, Day 509

On the bright side, Kim gets to keep Dennis Rodman.

Silver Lining, Day 508

Hats off to the world leader willing to meet with an egomaniacal, narcissistic sociopath! Kudos to you, Kim Jong Un!

Silver Lining, Day 507

Trump refusing to sign the G-7 statement. Now his "forgetting" to sign the Stormy Daniel's NDA makes more sense. I detect a pattern.

Silver Lining, Day 506

[This Silver Lining is on vacation in the lost city of Atlantis.]

Silver Lining, Day 505

Plot to kidnap Trump by a band of guerilla squirrels was aborted when Scruffy, King of the Squirrels, decided Donald was "not our kind of nut."

Silver Lining, Day 504

Dear President Trump: In addition to Canada, the following parties were also not responsible for burning down the White House in 1814 -

10. Barack Obama

9. Hillary Clinton

8. The Jews

7. Rosie O'Donnell

6. NFL players exercising free speech

5. Bad Hombres

4. Witches

3. Ruth Bader Ginsburg

2. Stormy Daniels

Or

1. James Comey playing with matches

Silver Lining, Day 503

There was no Silver Lining on Day 502 because Donald offered me $130,000 to stop. I'm lying, of course, but that's perfectly acceptable, right? Pardon me. They all can't be winners. Unless you're Trump. Then everything is a winner.

Silver Lining, Day 502

[This Silver Lining was abducted by aliens.]

Silver Lining, Day 501

John Bobbitt pardoned himself and how did that turn out? #FreeMelania #SleepWithOneEyeOpen #PotusPenisOnTheSouthLawn #DoesntKnowWhatPardonReallyMeans #TooMcchFunWithHashtags

Silver Lining, Day 500

Dingleberries are even like, "Stay away from THAT asshole!"

Silver Lining, Day 499

Twelve ice cream flavors renamed for the Trump era:

12 - Feckless Country Lemonade

11- Covfefe and Cream

10- Maple Gun Nut

9- Peanut Butter and Porn Star

8- Date Rape Nut

7- Lemon Dotard

6- Chocolate Chip Cookie Dope

5- Chunky Flunky

4- Cocky Toad

3- Make America Grape Again

2- Mangofuckyourself

And

1- Rum Racist

Silver Lining, Day 498

How about Feckless Dotard? A Sam Bee-Kim Jong Un mashup!