Silver Lining, Day 1247

Ten excuses for folks no-showing for the Trump rally in Tulsa: 

10. Re-painting the oil well. 

9. Catching up on Watchmen. 

8. Rediscovering empathy. 

7. Rehearsing production of Oklahoma! 

6. Binge Watching Love Island (UK). 

5. Filling William Barr pinatas with chinchilla feces. 

4. Buying illegal fireworks to send to Brooklyn in a conspiracy to inappropriately disrupt Zoom calls for work-from-home laborers. 

3. Watching Fox News for their daily dose of Donald Fan Fiction. 

2. Karaoke festival of songs banned from MTV. 

 And 

1. Realizing that Tulsa spelled backwards is "a slut," which explains Donald's attraction to T-Town.